


Equal

by kjonginexo



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending, Implied Smut, Lotto AU, M/M, More fluff than angst, baekhyun's a pimp, chanyeol's an underground boxer, guess the ending ship!, jongin's a prostitute, sehun dabbles in drugs, slight violence but its not bad, the rest don't have a part really but they have their parts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-28
Updated: 2018-09-28
Packaged: 2019-07-18 12:25:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16118414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kjonginexo/pseuds/kjonginexo
Summary: Jongin was sure he'd never be anything more than a prostitute until he fell in love with someone who assures him otherwise.





	Equal

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: kaihunnies
> 
> I ALSO MADE A NEW TUMBLR exoficreview WHERE I REVIEW EXO FICS I LIKE OR DISLIKE N JUST REALLY GIVE MY OPINIONS SO CHECK THAT OUT IF UR INTERESTED!
> 
> I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS

Smeared eyeliner seemed to be a constant in Jongin’s life. His eyes burned as the kohl black liner mingled with his tears and pricked into the whites of his eyes. Fingers digging into the strongly toned bicep as he let Chanyeol fuck him open, small moans of his own harmonizing with the low strong throaty groans. His head was tilted back against the bed, listening to the smack of skin on skin or the bed frame smacking against the wall. Chanyeol’s always a good fuck, Jongin thinks to himself as he felt his body shake and writhe underneath the male. Always so willing to please Jongin despite his job being to please the customer. Jongin liked the way his deep voice whispered in his ear about how good he is, how pretty he is, sexy he is. 

It’s all things he hears daily but coming from someone who sounds like he genuinely means it is always so good to hear. Chanyeol’s last moan choked out in a stutter, and Jongin knew he was close as he rocked his hips against Chanyeol and clenched to urge him closer to an orgasm. It wasn’t until Chanyeol’s hips stuttered and pushed all the way in where he felt the warmth of Chanyeol’s release wrapped within the condom. Jongin’s body shivered, dropping his tanned legs from Chanyeol’s hips as he leaned against the bed and whined out quietly when Chanyeol jerked him to completion. 

His eyes fluttered shut, it felt like a century since he had a moment to rest but he knew, in reality, it had been a few hours. Eyelids heavy, stinging from the liner that smeared down his face. “Jongin,” Chanyeol murmured, making his eyes open and a small hiss when Chanyeol pulled out. “Yeah?” Voice so quiet that he was sure Chanyeol didn’t hear him, but Chanyeol leaned down and pressed his mouth soundly to Jongin’s. He felt the scab on Chanyeol’s lip, probably from a fight or something, Jongin wishes he was a little more careful. He liked Chanyeol, he’s a good guy and they talk sometimes during their sessions. Chanyeol being an underground boxer is a dangerous gig and it didn’t help that Chanyeol constantly took risks he didn’t have to take. 

He bragged about his matches to Jongin when he won, Jongin listened with his jaw clenched in nerves to each bloody detail of the story. Too many times did Jongin nurse his wounds before fucking him, he assumes Chanyeol’s his friend. It seems as if Chanyeol feels the same, but it doesn’t stop Chanyeol from paying his pimp to fuck him. “I’ll see you, my match is this Wednesday if you wanna stop by?” Chanyeol asked as he discarded the condom and dressed, leaving Jongin to curl into the blankets and smile lazily. “I’ll see if I can make it. You know we have a pretty fucked up friendship?” Chanyeol laughed as he pulled over his shirt, fluffing up his bright red hair and smiled down at Jongin who looked comfortable and warm on the bed. 

“I’m willing to call this a friendship with benefits, less fucked up if you put it that way. See you, Jongin.” Jongin waved Chanyeol out the door of his bedroom, closing his eyes as he lazily gripped a cool pillow to rest his cheek against. Silence, Jongin lived for silence when he could get it. His life is noisy and that’s not including the people in it who make it louder than it needed to be. Being a prostitute is a job that not everyone could handle, sometimes even Jongin couldn’t handle it too much. It took him a while to get used to having to work to please other people, be what they want to see and do what they ask him to do, touching him in new ways he hadn’t thought of or open his mind to new kinks.

It took him a while to get used to being desired for one thing and one thing only. Chanyeol’s a special case, Chanyeol may fuck him and kiss him and leave immediately after but they have some semblance of a friendship so at least he bothered to get to know him as a person. His other clients only know him for his name and the things that can make them come the fastest. It’s a loud job for someone who can handle it, Jongin thinks he does okay, his pimp never once complained.

His pimp is a bit biased though since Jongin happens to be his favorite. Baekhyun’s a pimp of him and two other men. It’s a bit obvious though that Baekhyun favors him the most, he likes to take Jongin out to be his date on many occasions. Sometimes he’ll take Minseok or Yixing if Jongin’s too tired or busy with someone else, but mostly it’s always Jongin. He’ll get Jongin ready himself, flirt with him the most and compliment him more with more touches. Jongin’s also admitted to waking up more than a few times in Baekhyun’s sheets. He adores Jongin, and Jongin’s okay with it. Jongin didn’t despise Baekhyun since Baekhyun treated all of them well, and he definitely makes sure they’re all safe, Jongin considers Baekhyun his friend. 

Jongin’s actual friends are Minseok and Yixing though, the three of them are best friends who spend a lot of time together. It makes sense for them to spend time together, all doing the same things and all living under the same house can naturally make people bond. Even though Minseok and Yixing know that Jongin is Baekhyun’s favorite, they don’t hold it against him. Baekhyun treats them well and they’ve made it clear they’re more than okay without the special treatment. Jongin doesn’t need it either but it’s nice at least. He likes being treated like an equal with Minseok and Yixing, like an actual human being instead of an object or a pretty thing with a price tag.

 

Jongin felt a dip in his bed but he didn’t open his eyes, not when he felt so comfortable, sated, at peace. “Jongin-ah,” Baekhyun’s light voice whispered, feeling the warmth of the shorter man’s body curl against his back. His arm snaked around his hip and Jongin only hummed in response, refusing to open his eyes. “I wanna see you,” Baekhyun whispered, and with a little sigh, Jongin opened his eyes and turned to roll on his back. Baekhyun smirked down at him, straddling over Jongin’s waist as he ran his hands against Jongin’s tan torso.

“You like Chanyeol, don’t you? He’s always so good to you, pays you so well, but you could’ve been having so much more fun with me.”

Baekhyun knows Jongin’s body very well, he made the second time of them sleeping together dedicated to figuring everything about Jongin out. Jongin just wanted to get under his skin as he shook his head, hands by his sides. “I’m not so sure, he has a way of pinning me down and fucking me until I’m shaking,” Baekhyun’s eyebrow cocked up, reaching down to tease his fingertips over Jongin’s cock making him hiss out in oversensitivity. “Are you sure about that? You’re a lot more agreeable when I’m fucking you, begging for me to make you come.”

Jongin swatted Baekhyun’s hand away, smiling lazily up at him, “you’re cute trying to assert your dominance over me,” Baekhyun leaned down and flicked his tongue over Jongin’s nipple and grazed his teeth against it, making the other hiss out a whimper as he raised his chest. “I don’t need to assert anything over you when your body practically molds to my single touch,” Baekhyun leaned up and pressed his mouth to Jongin’s own, a chaste kiss that lasted a few moments.

“We’re going out tonight, all four of us. Yifan’s hosting a party and so graciously invited us,” Jongin tilt his head to the side, watching Baekhyun tease his nipple with his fingertips as Jongin let out soft little sounds, pressing a soft kiss to his mouth. Jongin preferred it that he didn’t get kissed. He only had one client who didn’t kiss him and it was Jongdae, cold and detached just how Jongin liked him. Jongin felt like kissing was a little too intimate and even shared that with both Baekhyun and Chanyeol who assured him it’s just a kiss, and since then the kissing with both of them never stopped. Jongin knew they didn’t want to ever date him, especially Baekhyun who constantly brings home, someone, to sleep with.

“Are we recruiting anyone new or getting new clients?” Jongin asked quietly, watching as Baekhyun’s lips formed a smirk, “if you want to. I wanted you to enjoy yourself. I’m sure people will know who I am so, don’t be surprised if I call you over and show you off.” Jongin giggled at that, he always showed Jongin off no matter where they were. “Fine, Baekhyun, get off me and stop playing with my nipples so I can get dressed.” Baekhyun snorted quietly and lifted his weight off of Jongin and got off the bed, going to his closet. “Do you still have that burgundy velvet suit I got you? Wash your face for me, Jonginnie,” Baekhyun commented and Jongin nodded, opening the other closet door to reveal his suits. 

He sat at his vanity and washed the makeup off with a wipe and revealed a clean face. Baekhyun sighed happily as he walked over to Jongin, running his hands over his shoulders, “you’re so pretty. Prettier when you’re begging for me on my cock but, that’s another matter for another time,” Jongin ignored the small clench in his stomach at his words and the blush that painted his cheeks. He focused on Baekhyun primping him and getting him ready for the party after he sat himself down on Jongin’s lap.

 

Yifan’s parties were always sensational, loud and so full of life. Jongin ended up forgetting wanting the peace and tranquility of silence when he got swept up in the waves of noise. The four of them stood in front of it, Jongin stood in between Yixing and Baekhyun, feeling Baekhyun’s fingers curl around his hips caught his attention from the booming bass from within the party. “I want all of you to have fun, don’t worry about working too much. You all look so sexy and I wish I could really express how good you all look,” Minseok snorted, whacking Baekhyun on the shoulder. Yixing and Jongin had smiles on their lips, all used to Baekhyun’s sexual innuendos. “I’ll find you when it’s time to leave, bye babies,” Baekhyun smirked at the three of them and before Jongin could walk off, Baekhyun clung to the velvet suit jacket.

“You don’t need to hang around me, I wanna get laid,” Jongin nodded through a laugh, tilting his head to the side. “Good, don’t need people thinking you’re in love with me,” Baekhyun laughed at that as well as his fingers traced over the strong chest beneath the suit jacket and button down. “You’re just my favorite, Jonginnie. I don’t fall in love. Have fun,” Jongin nodded and walked in with Baekhyun before getting swarmed in the loud music and the smell of alcohol.

He remembers the conversation he had with Yixing one night about how he pretends some nights like tonight that he isn’t a prostitute. That he could talk to someone and maybe get their number and schedule a date, and how the thought of pretending made him smile. Jongin, on the other hand, was far too much of a realist. He had a bad taste in guys for dating, that and no one would date a prostitute. Movies like Pretty Woman stayed in movies, and Jongin knew if he did meet someone and he managed to keep it a secret until he eventually told them, they’d leave. He’s okay with not having a boyfriend, not falling in love, and being a prostitute. Sometimes he gets lonely and thinks about what it’s like, but then he remembers that his only two options to date would be Baekhyun or Chanyeol and both were dead ends so he quickly erased the thought before he could divulge on it.

Jongin wandered through the sweaty crowd as he went to the kitchen for a drink, pouring himself vodka in a red solo cup. It burned going down his throat, not as bad as eyeliner in the whites of his eyes but it stung his throat and made him wince. He took a breather, trying to get himself in the mood to dance with somebody or at least be pleasurable to talk to. Usually, he’s all work, very little play. He finds it humorous (just the tiniest bit) that he has to loosen up to be pleasurable even though his job is dabbling in the business of pleasure. Jongin sighed as he finished half the cup of vodka, standing alone in the kitchen making polite smiles at those who grace him with the same, ignoring the smirks thrown his way as they checked him out, focusing on his drink. 

Being the loner of the party isn’t usually in his label or personality description. He liked being the life of it, he liked being swept up in it but right now, his brain was somewhere else and it definitely didn’t help that he was making it foggy with each sip of his drink. “Jongin?” He lifted his head up from the clear alcohol, looking over at Minseok who flashed him a soft smile. “Minnie, hi,” he managed out, feeling a little more relaxed when Minseok stood next to him. “Feeling okay? Usually, you’re out dancing by now,” Jongin shrugged, chugging the rest of the drink and went back to the table to top himself off again. “Who knows, been a little off today since before Chanyeol came by. Wanna come with me on Wednesday to his match?” Jongin turned his head to the shorter who shook his head with a frown, “no, Luhan comes in on Wednesday. You know he tends to take up most of my time.”

Jongin definitely knew a thing or two about Luhan and not just from passing stories from Minseok. He sighed though and smiled weakly, “it’s okay. I’ll go by myself, he likes when I show up for some reason,” Minseok snorted now, nudging Jongin gently, “maybe because he likes you and when you play nurse for him? New kink of his maybe,” Jongin laughed shaking his head, feeling infinitely better than he did coming in. He took another sip of the vodka, feeling a hand on his shoulder gather his attention now. “Jongin-ah,” Baekhyun’s voice calmed him from his laughter but he offered the pimp a warm smile, “yeah?” Jongin looked up at the stranger next to him who managed to take his breath away. 

Milky skin with high cheekbones, thick black hair that seemed messily styled, parted more to the right side of his face. He wore a navy blue silk shirt with white vertical stripes that framed his broad shoulders perfectly. Black slacks that hugged his legs perfectly, and Jongin could’ve sworn he’s one of the most handsome people his eyes had ever laid eyes on. “This gentleman here was looking for someone he could dance with, and who better to dance with him than my best dancer?” Baekhyun had a glimmer in his eye, and Jongin knew he was trying to get him a new client and for once, Jongin didn’t want to shrug him off. Jongin didn’t shrug off Chanyeol or Jongdae, only because Chanyeol had charm and Jongdae paid too much to turn down. This stranger was too pretty for Jongin to turn down, he genuinely wanted to be in bed with him.

“Sure, does this stranger have a name?” Jongin drawled out with a pleasant smirk making direct eye contact, stepping over to the other man who looked at him with a confident smirk that made Jongin’s knees buckle together. Just a little bit, he couldn’t be completely weak to this man. “Sehun,” Jongin nodded, watching Sehun lift his hand and Jongin took it in his own. “Let’s go dance, Sehun.”

The wave of being in a party swept over him as Sehun led him out to where the dancing was. The alcohol made his concerns fog over, the music made his body feel warm, and when Sehun pressed Jongin in his space it felt like fire. Sehun smelled like expensive cologne, and Jongin was never really a fan of cologne but Sehun pulled it off. His hands found purchase on Sehun’s shoulder with his fingers hooking into the silk shirt. He couldn’t even look at Sehun’s smirk or he’d feel weak, and right now he wanted control of them dancing until Sehun took it from him. Jongin pressed his hips against Sehun’s to grind to the music and a gasp fell from his mouth at the way Sehun’s hands gripped hard on his hips to hold him close. They moved their hips in time to the beat, legs sliding between one another and Jongin wrapped his arms around Sehun, resting his forehead against Sehun’s. 

Jongin knew each pant was swallowed by the music but he could hear Sehun’s every breath. “What do you do?” He heard himself ask, watching a smile light up Sehun’s face as Sehun’s hands roamed along the slope of Jongin’s spine, “I supply drugs. I suppose you supply in pleasure?” Jongin nodded with a small smile of his own, feeling goosebumps beneath his close prick at his skin to Sehun’s every touch. “I do, are you interested?” Sehun nodded, smiling at Jongin brightly now. “More than,” and words weren’t needed more after that. Jongin’s mouth was invaded by Sehun’s and the concept of being in a public space or personal space didn’t matter as they intruded one another’s boundaries. Stumbling up the stairs to an empty bedroom. 

Jongin’s back was against the silk bedsheets that felt similar to Sehun’s shirt that laid discarded on the floor in a matter of seconds. Jongin’s skin flushed with a rush of goosebumps when Sehun stripped him. Jongin focused on Sehun’s mouth against his own that tasted like tequila and lime juice, and Jongin hadn’t ever been one for tequila but if it was on Sehun’s tongue, he’d make an exception. He focused on the warmth his mouth emitted and how his gut clenched with butterflies, how Sehun’s fingers ran down his skin and dug into his hips. He was sure there would be faint marks after this but he didn’t care. 

He focused on the way that Sehun’s mouth trailed down his neck, then chest before removing his pants to place kisses against his thighs and whisper soft compliments like how hot he is, sexy he is. Jongin’s smile felt permanent, and eventually, Sehun’s fingers were wet with his spit as he worked Jongin open despite him not needing it. Chanyeol always got him loose and ready but Sehun insisted Jongin would look pretty being fucked on his fingers. Things went too fast after that when Sehun fucked into him. Bigger than anything Jongin had taken before but he could feel himself quickly becoming obsessed with the way Sehun made him feel so full. Becoming obsessed with the way his hips fucked into him with a loose elegant grace that still carried so much strength. Obsessed with the sloppy kisses against one another’s mouths, and Jongin came untouched along with Sehun coming on his stomach.

Jongin heaved a few deep breaths as Sehun brushed his fingers along the skin of his thighs with a soft sigh. “Who do I pay?” Sehun’s voice sounded so harsh in the blissful moment Jongin was experiencing, and the sentence seemed like a slap back into reality. He should’ve expected it, but he didn’t expect the warmth that was in his body to suddenly feel so cold. “Um, Baekhyun,” Sehun smirked down at him, leaning down to press a kiss to his mouth and nipped on his bottom lip, tugging back on it. “I’ll be seeing you soon, you’re a good dealer in pleasure, Jongin.” Jongin smiled weakly with cheeks slightly pink from the kiss. “See you soon,” and Sehun left fast just how he came in. 

Jongin curled in the blankets after shrugging on the suit jacket, wanting to feel covered just a little, cheek against a cold pillow as he sighed and closed his eyes. Silence, no thoughts, just silence. He didn’t want to think about how his life was a flurry of people coming in and leaving just as fast as they came. He didn’t want to think about the possibility of being alone forever. He just wanted to reminisce in the silence and the muted music from the party below.

 

Wednesday came a little too fast for Jongin’s liking. It’s not that he hated going to Chanyeol’s fights, he liked supporting Chanyeol and helping him afterward and sometimes he looked cute when he smiled at Jongin thinking he wouldn’t show. He hated the blood, he hated the wounds, he hated feeling anxious that Chanyeol would get seriously hurt. He cared a lot about Chanyeol, despite their relationship being what it is and nothing more. Jongin hadn’t thought a lot about it being anything more than what it is, and he kept it that way. 

Jongin messed with the frayed rips on his jeans until he heard the bell chime in the warehouse. Chanyeol’s fights were always in dingy abandoned warehouses that had dim yellow lights or built-in spotlights with shitty rings that had blood stains against them. Jongin didn’t like them, always made his nose scrunch in disgust at it, but Chanyeol never seemed to mind. Jongin lifted his head to the announcer, introducing Chanyeol’s opponent. People who kept up with the fights always cheered for Chanyeol since he rarely ever lost. His reputation is known for being untouchable, Jongin smiled at the thought alone that Chanyeol didn’t lose very often.

“We have our house favorite,” Jongin snorted at the constant changing warehouses being called a ‘house’ but he listened anyway. “Chanyeol!” Chanyeol walked out shirtless with tape wrapped around his knuckles, stoic face that was far different from the grin with far too many teeth. Jongin preferred the grin, but he knew the taller had to maintain appearances. Jongin ignored his phone vibrating in his pocket to stand up and cheer for Chanyeol, and he almost cracked a smile when he caught Jongin’s eye. 

Jongin sat down and fished in his pocket for his phone, Baekhyun texting him about an appointment with Sehun tomorrow night. Jongin responded with an ‘okay’ and ignored the very little warmth in his stomach before focusing back on the fight. The bell rang once more as the fight began, and Chanyeol always let his competitor get the first punch even if it made a cut bleed into his skin and Jongin wince with a clenched jaw. He watched with rapt attention as Chanyeol landed a punch to his gut, a sharp uppercut. Joining the crowd with a cheer, making Jongin grin as he rose to his feet once again. Fists curled into a ball that matched the clenched jaw and anxiety bubbled in his chest as Chanyeol got a rather harsh punch to his jaw that made blood dribble past his lower lip. 

He let out a pained whimper, watching Chanyeol get punched a few more times until he came back stronger, punching the man down to the ground and bent down over him, punching him ruthlessly in the face. Jongin cheered with the crowd and the man beneath him smacked the ring floor to show mercy and Chanyeol got up, announcing his win, and the crowd stayed for the next match while Jongin made his way out from the stands and towards the back behind a red velvet curtain. The bouncers knew him by now, letting him through and he made a beeline over to Chanyeol who sat unwrapping his fists that were cut and bloodied. 

Jongin didn’t get a chance to say anything as he approached Chanyeol, watching the grin light up his lips. “Jongin! Come here,” Jongin nodded, going over to Chanyeol who sat on a bench and he took a seat down in front of him, straddling over it. “Your mouth,” Jongin whispered quietly, thumbing over his chin with a soft frown. Chanyeol chuckled, always so good natured and Jongin wonders how he managed to hold all the optimism in the world within his hands. “I’m fine baby,” Chanyeol replied softly, eyes on Jongin who sighed and shook his head. He got off the bench and went to the small table with hand towels, grabbing a few and two water bottles before sitting back down. He drenched a towel in one and wrung it out to dry, scooting over along the bench and dabbed the towel on his mouth. 

He never flinched, Jongin’s noticed. Maybe he’s used to these wounds, maybe he’s used to the pain of cleaning his wounds. Chanyeol’s hands felt warm on his thighs as he gripped them and urged Jongin to sit on his lap. Jongin smiled faintly, ignoring the faint pulse of butterflies as he grabbed a dry towel and dried the blood on his bottom lip and held it to keep pressure. He noticed then the blood on Chanyeol’s teeth, the cuts on his cheek and nose. Jongin figured he could bandage those. He grabbed his free hand and the damp towel and cleaned at the wounds against his cheek and nose. “You know you don’t have to clean these, I’ll be fine.” 

Jongin looked into Chanyeol’s eyes, feeling the warmth of his fingers slip in between the ripped holes in his jeans as he shrugged. “I don’t like seeing you hurt and you can’t leave these open like that. Do you have bandages?” Chanyeol shook his head, making Jongin sigh quietly and dab at the newly cleaned wounds with the dry towel. He set them down and reached back to grab the full water bottle and handed it to the fighter who smelled of sweat. Jongin didn’t mind, Chanyeol made sweat look good. “Drink, I know you don’t drink enough,” Chanyeol rolled his eyes with a smile but took a sip and capped the bottle back. 

“Do you have anywhere to be?” Chanyeol asked, and Jongin knew it was an invitation to hang out with him despite the words never actually being said. Jongin also knew this invitation could mean one or two things, he either wanted to actually hang out with him or fuck him and Jongin didn’t know which one. Jongin didn’t know and he didn’t want it to just be a fuck session for him but despite not knowing, he found himself saying “no I’m free.” Chanyeol smiled, and Jongin thought his smile was lovely, always has. 

Chanyeol was a client Jongin could’ve easily turned down given the fact that he had too many at the time. Juggling ten clients was rough for someone who couldn’t ever schedule his own appointments and had to work through Baekhyun. He made enough money, and he only humored meeting Chanyeol since Minseok mentioned about him being perfect for him to work with. Meaning, Chanyeol was too vanilla for Minseok. Minseok had a certain clientele where it was mainly rough things, whips and nipple clamps. Jongin wasn’t one for that, he liked blindfolds and being tied down but being whipped and such wasn’t his type. Yixing tended to fuck people, act as the top of their dreams, so naturally, Chanyeol sorted to Jongin. Originally, Jongin had clear intentions to meet him and shut him down, but Chanyeol’s charm won him over. Chanyeol’s charm was his grin with far too many teeth, the way his deep voice smoothed out so easily, the way Chanyeol’s eyes were so easy on him and made Jongin feel like the only human being in existence. Jongin only had three clients now including Chanyeol, and he was sure Chanyeol was going to stick around for a long time as long as he kept doing prostitution. 

Chanyeol hummed quietly, cupping Jongin’s cheek making his face heat at the sudden intimate contact. He knew it meant nothing, much like their kisses, he hated making such intimate contact when he knew it meant absolutely nothing and he had to sit and feel pathetic for feeling any semblance of emotion. “Have dinner with me? I feel like we don’t spend enough time together,” Jongin’s eyes widened, pointing to himself. “Have dinner with me?” Chanyeol snorted, looking around and gesturing to the empty area. “I don’t see another boy sitting on my lap, do you?” Jongin giggled at that, shaking his head, biting his lip, “we just don’t hang together outside of my bedroom or in between your fights. Thought you didn’t want that.”

Chanyeol looked at Jongin in a way he couldn’t determine, he hadn’t seen this look on Chanyeol’s face before but he didn’t have much time to think as Chanyeol’s mouth invaded his space. Jongin could taste the copper of blood from his teeth, but Jongin liked the warmth and safety of Chanyeol’s mouth. He pressed his hands on the back of Chanyeol’s neck as he sighed into his mouth, a pleasant happy sigh. Chanyeol deepened the kiss then as he held Jongin by the small of his back, pulling away. Jongin took a small breath and Chanyeol hummed, “that should change starting tonight, so please, Jongin. Have dinner with me?” Jongin nodded with a shy smile, “love to.”

 

Jongin didn’t know a lot about Chanyeol, it seems. It’s not his fault since they don’t really spend a lot of time together and he knew the important things that applied to certain situations like how Chanyeol liked to fuck and how to tend to his wounds. As it turns out, Chanyeol likes the hole in the wall restaurants such as the ramen shop they sat in now. Jongin sitting across from him with a smile on his lips as he lifted the noodles to his mouth with the chopsticks trying not to laugh at Chanyeol’s dramatic retelling of his dog running loose in the dog park. Jongin’s sure that Chanyeol’s dog, Toben, got loose for only a few seconds but Chanyeol made it sound like Toben walked to the ends of the earth and went on a journey only a few brave men would make. 

“Sounds like he had a good time though,” Jongin giggled, sipping on his water and felt his heart jump in his chest at Chanyeol’s smile. “He did, do you like dogs baby?” Jongin pushed down the butterflies as he nodded, smiling faintly. “I do, I used to have three but then I moved to Seoul,” he muttered quietly, mixing the soup with his chopsticks. “What made you come out here?” Jongin shrugged, swallowing thickly before shoveling the noodles in his mouth. “I came out to my parents and they didn’t want much to do with me so I left to Seoul and did some dancing in a club until I met Baekhyun,” he smiled wearily up at Chanyeol who looked at him with a slight frown.

“Do you like doing this stuff?” Jongin froze, looking up at Chanyeol from the broth of his ramen. He didn’t ever get asked this question, and sure Chanyeol may be trying to get to know him but he’s still a client. “I don’t know if I should say,” he admitted, he didn’t care about telling the truth but he worried about losing Chanyeol if he did say the truth. “Hey,” Chanyeol’s fingertips held the bottom of Jongin’s chin, “I’m not your client right now. I’m Chanyeol, and you’re Jongin. We’re out here together because I want to know the real you, not to fuck you and pay you for it. Don’t be afraid to tell me the truth, baby.” Jongin’s face felt like it was submerged in a pit of flames and he felt like he was suffocating on his blush that managed to flush down to the back of his neck.

It felt almost too liberating to be freed from his title, and while he had his real friends like Minseok and Yixing, they were like him. He didn’t know anybody in his life anymore that knew him as Just Jongin, and it took Chanyeol to make him feel a little freer. “I like parts of it, like meeting you is a huge plus. Baekhyun’s lovely and so are Minseok and Yixing but I don’t like… never mind.” He concluded, he couldn’t share the fact that he gets upset when they leave him so fast to lay alone in an empty bed. He couldn’t share that vulnerability and weakness. “What is it?” Jongin shook his head, eating the ramen again before setting the chopsticks down to put his hands on the side of the bowl. 

“It’s nothing,” Chanyeol frowned, humming quietly, “I don’t care about what it is. It could be that someone’s too rough or that you even feel gross afterward. I wanna know.” Jongin took a small breath, looking down at the broth in the bowl. “I don’t like that everyone leaves right after, and I’m alone.” The table went silent after that, Jongin knew he made a mistake and his stomach felt queasy from it. He felt skittish, leg twitching and ready to leave at any moment until Chanyeol’s fingers lifted his chin again and held it in place between his thumb and index finger. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I thought those were the rules,” Jongin went to shake his head and reply that it’s fine, to not worry about it until Chanyeol barreled on, “I’ll stay with you afterward, and don’t try to change my mind.” 

Jongin blushed once more and put his hand over Chanyeol’s. “Chanyeol,” Chanyeol shook his head and leaned across the table to press a chaste kiss to his mouth, “hush. I want to.” Jongin stared at his eyes and eventually, a small smile fell across his lips. He didn’t want to say anymore and moved on to the next topic, Chanyeol. “Why do you box?” Chanyeol shrugged, sitting back down on his seat with the grin with too many teeth placing his lips. “Well, I just wanted to fight. When I was younger I wanted to box professionally, but I couldn’t. My friend Kyungsoo organizes cockfights and he introduced me to my manager now and, I wanted to.” 

Jongin grinned now, he liked knowing it was a choice for Chanyeol and not just a means of survival. “I’m glad it’s something you actually wanna do, although you’d look hot with a guitar,” Chanyeol’s loud laugh filled the restaurant, joined in by Jongin’s own. Jongin was sure he hadn’t laughed like this in a long time but he liked it, he felt so free. “A guitar? You into musicians?” Jongin smile was sly as he nodded, “nothing sexier than a guy who can play guitar. Pretty sure I’d sleep with a guy if he played me a song on guitar.”Chanyeol laughed and hummed, nodding, “I’ll keep that in mind. Can I get your number so I can stop texting Baekhyun to see if you’re free?” Jongin giggled, nodding as he pulled out his phone.

“You still have to book appointments through him but talking to me is fine,” Jongin mentioned, loading his contacts and handed the phone to Chanyeol to let the male add himself. Jongin felt so free, so happy, so at ease. He didn’t know if Chanyeol was just being nice, but Jongin willed away any notion that this meant more. He couldn’t deal with the false hope if it wasn’t. He took his phone back as they stood, bowls empty with broth sitting in them and Chanyeol dropped enough cash on the table to cover both meals and a tip. Walking outside in the humid heat of the night, Chanyeol cupped Jongin’s cheek and pressed a kiss to his mouth soundly. Jongin hummed and returned the kiss, it was soft, meaningful, gentle, sweet. Jongin liked it like this. “Text me,” Chanyeol murmured against his mouth and Jongin nodded, waving goodbye to Chanyeol as he made his way to the bus stop not without sending a text to Chanyeol immediately.

 

Jongin didn’t know how Sehun wanted him. Usually, with clients, they wanted Jongin to be ready for them a certain way. Chanyeol was easy, always wanted Jongin to be as he is so they could have something more natural despite the process itself being set up through an appointment. Jongdae liked Jongin naked and ready with three different ties set on the bed, one for his wrists, one for his mouth, and one for a blindfold. Sehun was new, Sehun was a wild card in Jongin’s deck and he wasn’t entirely sure on what to do. He decided maybe for some boxers and a tee shirt, minimal clothes so Sehun wouldn’t have to go the extra mile to undress him. 

A knock on the door shook Jongin from his train of thoughts, twiddling his fingers nervously as he sighed out quietly to relax. “Come in,” he called, watching the door open to Sehun in a black button-down with the top three undone, and black ripped skinny jeans with a silver necklace hanging against his collarbones. Jongin really hoped that maybe it was the alcohol that made Sehun really attractive but he bit his tongue when no, it was just Sehun being attractive, and Jongin loathed the truth. “Hey, you look cute,” Sehun commented.

Jongin knew his face looked fine since Baekhyun put makeup on him through long kisses and some slight grinding that almost had Baekhyun come in his pants. He didn’t mention that though and pasted on a smile with his head cocked to the side, “thanks. I didn’t know how you wanted me so I played it safe with this,” Sehun chuckled and took a seat next to him on the bed. “You look good like this, don’t worry about how you should present yourself for me when the end result is all the same,” Jongin’s sure Sehun must’ve thought that sounded sexy but it made the reality of this being a meaningless fuck and Jongin being an object more real.

He ignored it though and pasted on a smile, deciding to make Sehun’s money worth as he straddled over his lap and rested his hands against his collarbones. 

“Remember how you said I supply pleasure?” He asked in a hot whisper, temple against the side of his forehead, nipping just on Sehun’s earlobe and smirked when he felt Sehun’s hands run along the bare skin of his thighs. “What about it?” Jongin wished Sehun’s voice didn’t sound so cold even though it sounded so heated, he wished that it felt like Sehun didn’t look down on him or just see him as a whore. Jongdae was good at pretending for someone who felt so cold and detached, he at least treated Jongin with a semblance of respect. Chanyeol, well, Chanyeol’s a rarity. “I supply pleasure from the moment you walk in the door, to the second you leave,” Jongin kept his character going.

He ran his hands to the buttons, unbuttoning each individual button of what’s left on the shirt. “So if you want me a certain way, feel free to tell me.” He finished his thought and felt Sehun jerk back on his hair which made a breathy gasp fall from his mouth. “I see, I’ve been made clear that all you’re good for is pleasure, nothing more,” Jongin felt a punch of hurt sear through his gut and his eyes started to sting but he blinked it away and looked down at Sehun again, “I already had my test run with you and you pleased me well, I can only hope that the claim of you being the best and only good at making me feel good holds up well for longer than one night.”

Jongin felt like suffocating at the moment, felt so much pain at the words he said since it really was clear that he was only an object and that was his main goal; to please sexually and nothing more. He kept up his charade though of being turned on and the thoughts lingered in his mind even as Sehun fucked him thoroughly. Sehun’s a good fuck and he’ll give him that much, but his personality hurt Jongin more than anything. Sex blurred together and he came in Sehun’s hand, panting as he stared up at Sehun, releasing him through two orgasms. Sehun grinned down at him, and Jongin felt nothing but cold energy now as he stared up at the cold brown eyes.

Even the way Sehun held his cheek afterward made Jongin feel cold but then, Sehun brushed his nose over his. “You okay?” No, Jongin certainly wasn’t okay but he hesitantly nodded anyway and looked down at Sehun’s collarbone. “Fine,” Sehun nudged his nose against his cheek to gather Jongin’s attention, “did I upset you?” Jongin shook his head slowly and watched Sehun sigh out in relief and pull out without missing a beat. “Good, it’d be dumb if I did,” and just like that, any warmth that filled him was replaced with cold. “Right,” Jongin curled against the blanket, watching Sehun dress and crawl back over the bed, straddling over him. 

“That sounded mean, I just mean, it’d be dumb if I upset you on my part. I’d be that stupid to do it without knowing,” Jongin didn’t meet his eyes, shrugging, “you didn’t. I did my job, and that’s all.” Sehun cupped his cheek then and nudged his nose over Jongin’s before pressing a kiss to his mouth that lasted a few seconds before pulling away, “I’m sure there’s more to you than this, but I won’t be the one to find out.” Jongin watched Sehun pull away swiftly, heart colder than it was previously and watched Sehun walk out the door.

Jongin rubbed at his eyes with a sniffle. He hadn’t felt this miserable and low about himself since he first started and processed for the first time that he gave his body away for money. He heard the door open one more time and before Baekhyun could even make it to the bed, Jongin looked up at him, “cuddle me,” and the smirk fell from Baekhyun’s face. Baekhyun crawled in bed with him, wrapping his arms around him. “Did you tell Sehun all I’m good at is sex?” He whispered, and Baekhyun’s face furrowed into confusion. He’s always been a shit liar since his face gave everything away and Jongin knew he wasn’t going to be telling a lie. “No? Did he say that’s all your good for?” 

Jongin nodded, leaning against Baekhyun, sighing. “He said it was made known to him that this is all I’m good for,” Baekhyun’s thin fingers ran through his hair and he felt a warm kiss press to his forehead. “He’s wrong, and I’m sorry he said that. Do you want me to remove him?” Jongin could’ve easily said yes, but something compelled him to shake his head and meekly smile at Baekhyun. “No, I have someone who reminds me I’m more than this.” Baekhyun smiled and Jongin should’ve told him it was Chanyeol he had in mind, but he let the shorter have his moment.

 

Warmth, Jongin felt warmth curled around his waist as his eyes blinked blearily to adjust to the sunlight pouring in through his windows. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and turned to his side to find Baekhyun, face pressed against his back and Jongin smiled to himself at the comfort of someone finally beside him without needing to fuck them. Even if it was his pimp. He reached to the nightstand and pulled out his phone, smiling widely at the text message from Chanyeol, an apology for being so busy since he was training for a new fight.

Their text conversation wasn’t too fruitful since Wednesday night, and Jongin thought maybe he was boring the other or something but he knew Chanyeol had to be busy. Usually, Chanyeol booked an appointment for Friday two days prior, and now he sat with a clear schedule on Friday morning. Jongin replied back that it was okay, and he asked how Chanyeol was doing. He liked knowing how Chanyeol was doing, given the circumstances and what he put himself through. To fight, and to get hurt, Jongin wouldn’t admit it aloud but it worried him. 

His phone vibrated quickly and Jongin noticed the happy face follow by assurances that he’s fine, and he asked how Jongin’s doing, when could he see him, when could he make an appointment. Jongin rolled his eyes playfully, smiling fondly as he answered each question, a fine and anytime for both.

“Jongin-ah, why are you up so early?” Baekhyun’s voice scratched and immediately his lips found the skin of Jongin’s neck, nipping softly to leave a faint red mark that would fade within the hour. Kissing down his collarbones, Jongin ran his fingers through his hair, “guess my body woke me up,” Baekhyun tilt his head up, smiling lazily until Jongin’s phone vibrated with Chanyeol’s very simple, but heart fluttering reply of ‘I miss you’. A smirk fell on Baekhyun’s lips, “in love with your favorite little client now are we?” Jongin wanted to dodge the question for many reasons. One, he definitely isn’t in love with Chanyeol. Two, he didn’t want to talk about the fact that he may feel something for Chanyeol and how it couldn’t ever pan out because of who he is and what he does. Even though Chanyeol doesn’t care about that stuff, he made that clear the other night that he saw them as equals. 

“Jealous that he may be my favorite?” Baekhyun swat at his chest playfully, making both of them giggle. “I know you’re not in love with him but he’s obviously special if you’ve given a client a personal way to contact you,” Jongin shrugged then before sighing and turning to face Baekhyun. “I can’t have anything with him, I’m me and he’s him.” Baekhyun’s eyebrows furrowed, before sighing out angrily and cupping Jongin’s face. “Did that asshole from last night make you feel this shitty or have you always felt beneath everyone for being a prostitute?” Jongin sighed, turning to nudge his nose against Baekhyun’s palm and avoid the eye contact, it was too much for him at the moment. 

“I’ve always felt like this but I guess it was a hard slap in the face last night, especially after spending time with Chanyeol the way I did,” he mumbled, feeling Baekhyun’s fingers guide him to look at him once more. “Explain, you haven’t been honest with me Jonginnie,” Jongin would argue that it’s just keeping bits and pieces of his life private rather than lying but he didn’t want to argue and complied anyway. “I don’t know, it’s like… he told me we were equal. That he was Chanyeol and I’m Jongin, not a prostitute out with my client and I guess I never had anyone make me feel that way? Make me feel equal, make me feel like anything more than something to fuck. I don’t know, but it’s not something possible for me to have.” 

Baekhyun smiled faintly and shook his head as he thumbed his lip very gently over his bottom lip. “No, baby, it’s possible for you to have. Don’t give up on him so quick, reply and tell him you miss him too,” and Jongin smiled shyly with a blush on his cheeks as he replied that he missed him too. He did miss Chanyeol, he did miss that grin with too many teeth and the warmth the tall male seemed to radiate. Baekhyun reached in the bed and pulled out his phone, showing the screen to Jongin, “and turns out lover boy has plans with you tonight.” Jongin smiled widely, and double replied to Chanyeol with a see you tonight, to which Chanyeol replied with a smiley face before asking Jongin his favorite places to eat.

Jongin learned that Chanyeol definitely doesn’t like spicy food which made him giggle since Chanyeol’s exact wording was that it wasn’t sexy to see a grown man cry over a bite of kimchi and so, he’d save Jongin from that. He learned that he liked coffee and that he also liked Marvel movies so Jongin supposes that saves him from liking the worst thing in creation. Chanyeol sent him pictures of Toben and him cuddled up on the bed and Jongin’s heart almost combusted in his chest at the cuteness of it all. He learned a lot from that text conversation as he stayed cuddled in bed for the next three hours, enjoying his empty Friday. Chanyeol liked anime and comic books, fancy sports cars but he liked the old Jeep he had now more than anything. He liked vintage things, the 50’s era happened to be his favorite and Jongin mentioned a cute diner they could check out together, Chanyeol happily accepted. Chanyeol mentioned playing the guitar and piano, which he neglected to inform him about on Wednesday night and Jongin’s heart thumped in his chest. His cheeks ached from the smile that seemed to never disappear or fade from his lips.

Chanyeol liked hoodies, action movies but not the ones with cars, he believed in aliens, and he thought ghosts were real. Jongin thought the same things, and he thought it was endearing when he mentioned Bigfoot being real too. Jongin didn’t know much about Bigfoot, and Chanyeol sent a flurry of exclamation and question marks at the statement and promised to show Jongin everything about Bigfoot, to which Jongin replied with an okay. He also liked going to the beach, eating comfort food, and sweets. Jongin liked Chanyeol, and he thought maybe more than friends. Just a little bit though, he couldn’t completely go into liking Chanyeol from one simple three-hour text conversation. He did, however, want to spend more time with him and get to know him and kiss him. He wanted the kisses to mean something.

 

Chanyeol’s never late, and that didn’t change as he knocked on Jongin’s door at exactly eight o’clock. “Come in,” Jongin called out, sprawled against the bed in his boxers and a tee, he didn’t bother changing into something more casual. “Boxers today?” Chanyeol asked through a chuckle, never judging, Jongin noticed. Always warm and fond. “Yeah, I didn’t want to get dressed today and well, you want me for, however, I come. Today is one less layer of clothing,” he noted, watching Chanyeol grin and straddle over Jongin’s waist, cupping his face gently. “As much as I like texting you, it really doesn’t add up to the real ordeal of talking.” 

Jongin giggled now, leaning into Chanyeol’s hand as he brushed through the dyed red hair with his own fingers, “oh? Why’s that?” Chanyeol leaned down until their foreheads were resting against one another, making Jongin’s breath hitch and he hoped Chanyeol didn’t hear it. If he did or even noticed it, he didn’t show it as he smiled down at him. “I like your voice and seeing your pretty face makes it better. Sit on my lap, I like when you do,” Chanyeol got off him and sat on the bed, leaving Jongin to put his knees on either side of Chanyeol’s legs before wrapping them around his waist and hooking his ankles at the small of his back. Jongin’s throne seemed to be Chanyeol’s lap as he adjusted himself on the thinner thighs beneath him, hands settling on the back of Chanyeol’s neck. 

“I like your voice too,” Jongin commented after finally getting comfortable and meeting Chanyeol’s eyes who rubbed his sides with his thumbs softly. “You failed to mention that in things you like in our conversation today,” he playfully scolded, making Jongin laugh and hook his fingers into the ends of the taller’s hair. “You asked for things I like, not things I like about you,” Jongin scolded playfully in return and Chanyeol’s eyes widened. “Oh, so there’s a whole category of things you like about me?” Jongin’s cheeks heated, he needed a way to shut Chanyeol up and he did the one thing he knew to do. Jongin nudged his nose over Chanyeol’s with a small smile on his lips, “shut up” he murmured before pressing his lips to the others.

Chanyeol laughed into the kiss, holding Jongin by the hips to pull them closer together. Their chests were touching, and Jongin couldn’t help the sigh that escaped his mouth into Chanyeol’s at the feeling of his teeth nipping faintly against his lower lip. Jongin liked when Chanyeol did that, Jongin liked how Chanyeol kissed, but he didn’t like the way that it felt better than all the other times they’ve kissed or when Jongin has kissed anybody in general. Chanyeol pulled away but not for long, just to lay Jongin on his back. 

He liked how Chanyeol didn’t ever go straight into fucking, always took so much time to kiss Jongin until he was panting and breathless. Jongin never noticed the burn in his lungs before but he didn’t run out of breath, and he never noticed how his mind went foggy but yet everything was in focus. Jongin could hone in on the smell of laundry detergent on Chanyeol’s clothes, and the smell of his coconut shampoo. Jongin could feel the burning in his lungs when he could feel Chanyeol’s smile against his own and for something that felt so new, it felt too familiar. Like it was something he had been ignoring this whole time and shouldn’t have been like it was something he was missing out on. 

Unlike the night before where the sex blurred too fast in a flurry of actions, it felt like it slowed down. Time slowed it’s clock for Jongin to enjoy every moment with Chanyeol and it felt like every single kiss was engraved in his skin like a tattoo. Chanyeol’s fingers left behind flames with each touch but it didn’t burn painfully, it just felt like a warmth seeped into his skin with each touch Chanyeol laid on his body. Their fingertips brushed against one another until Chanyeol’s hands laced with Jongin’s own, lips stopping their place on Jongin’s exposed collarbone. “What do you like about me?” Chanyeol asked, voice husky, even in its whisper.

Jongin went quiet for a moment trying to think of a response as Chanyeol let go of his hand to slip off Jongin’s shirt, looking down at him. Jongin didn’t know a lot about Chanyeol, but he knew a whole lot more and he liked everything about him. Jongin looked into the warmth of his eyes and smiled faintly, running his fingers through his hair. “What isn’t there to like?” He whispered quietly, watching Chanyeol’s smile grow. “You took the easy way out, what do you like most about me?” Jongin shook his head, watching Chanyeol turn his head and kiss Jongin’s palm. That felt too intimate for something that isn’t intimate at all between them and yet, Jongin wanted more of that from Chanyeol. The burn he ignored is back in his lungs and this time, he didn’t push it down. “I was being honest, thank you very much. And I like that I feel safe with you,” Jongin finished shyly. 

Chanyeol’s touches felt more like tattoos pressing into Jongin’s skin, he memorized each touch, memorized each exhale of air that he emitted. He memorized the way his eyes looked at Jongin once he got him naked, his own body reacting with a flush sprawling down to his chest and goosebumps prickling his skin. He memorized the way weight of Chanyeol’s cock in his mouth and the hoarse ‘fuck’ he poured from his mouth, scratchy, needy, desperate for Jongin. If Jongin was the type to get off on power play, he’d get off on the power he has over Chanyeol right now, desperate and needy to fuck him, to come, and he memorized each of moment of it. Chanyeol’s fingers slipped in him perfectly, and they always felt so nice, but it felt like he could commit it all to memory even though he memorized this feeling long before. 

Jongin clung onto him with his fingernails digging in his shoulder blades, Chanyeol’s forehead against his own as he fucked him open with three fingers. His thighs were already shaking, nails scratching up his back to grab at his hair tightly between his fingers. His name poured from Jongin’s mouth and Jongin saw Chanyeol’s lips fall into a smile with his jaw slacked, and Jongin thought his smile looked best there. Chanyeol only pulled away for a condom and to slick himself up with more lube and the burn in his lungs transferred to a burn in his thighs when Chanyeol fucked into him.

For the first time, his mind felt foggy without focus as the only thing he could register is the pleasure. Jongin knew Chanyeol knew what he was doing and he’s so attentive to what he needs. To Jongin, he didn’t need to come untouched, he’d rather have someone fuck him and care about him having an orgasm at all, and Chanyeol was that person. Jongin feltChanyeol’s hands take his own again, the burn in his lungs soared as he tilts his head back against the bed with whimpers falling from his mouth he just noticed, he had only been listening to Chanyeol. Chanyeol’s nose nudged behind his ear as he whispered Jongin’s name against it, and with one last swift thrust to Jongin’s prostate, he released against his stomach while Chanyeol released into the condom. 

His mind snapped into focus, the burn in his lungs present as Chanyeol didn’t release his hands. Chanyeol looked down at him and pressed his mouth to Jongin’s chastely, but it meant something to Jongin and the feeling terrified him. He didn’t pull away though, waiting for Chanyeol to make the first move and he did a few moments later. He pulled out, pulling off the condom and tying it off before going to the trash and dumping it, sliding on his boxers. Jongin felt his heart sink and chest grow cold watching him put on his boxers, thoughts floated in his mind that he was leaving, and he’d be alone once more.

Surprise must’ve morphed on his face when Chanyeol laid down beside him and pulled him close to his chest because Chanyeol chuckled and kissed his forehead. “Thought I was gonna leave?” Jongin sheepishly nodded and he still kept his hands still against Chanyeol’s chest, “now that I know I can stay, you’ll have to kick me out before I’ll leave again.” Jongin looked up at him with his lips parted in awe, and he saw the slight panic in Chanyeol’s eyes when he felt his own eyes start to water. Jongin brought his arms tightly around him, burying his face in his chest with scattered kisses against it, closing his eyes tightly. “Thank you,” Chanyeol held him tight to his chest, and Jongin nudged his nose over his skin, feeling safer than he had in a long time. “Always,” Jongin tilt his head up and looked at him, cupping both his cheeks and thumbs against his cheekbones. 

He felt nervous, fingers slightly shaking to the touch and composure weakening at the eye contact Chanyeol was giving him. Chanyeol always initiated every kiss, and for once, Jongin wanted to kiss him. Jongin never kissed first, he always said it felt too intimate but laying here with Chanyeol, it felt intimate and maybe, it wasn’t just Jongin who felt something. He nudged his nose very gently over Chanyeol’s before letting his mouth press to Chanyeol’s. A smile met his lips when he heard Chanyeol’s surprised gasp and felt Chanyeol’s smile against his lips. He pulled away after a few long moments and left one little kiss to his chin, watching the red color flush on Chanyeol’s cheeks. 

“You never kiss me first,” Chanyeol whispered quietly, and Jongin nodded, “always felt a little too intimate for me, but I feel safe with you,” he didn’t tell the truth. He didn’t tell him that he wanted Chanyeol to mean it, and he didn’t tell him he kissed him first because he meant it. “I’m glad you do, Jongin,” Chanyeol murmured before pressing another kiss to his lips, pulling away a few moments later after the sweeter kiss. “What do you like most about me?” Jongin asked, and he expected the answer to be something like his body or his face, but Chanyeol smiled and brushed his calloused thumb against his soft lower lip. “Your laugh and your smile, they remind me of the sun.” 

“The sun?” Jongin parroted, watching Chanyeol nod and cup Jongin by both cheeks, and Jongin thought Chanyeol’s smile looked bright and warm, like the sun. “Yeah, because you’re bright, warm, and beautiful.” Jongin blushed, hiding his face in Chanyeol’s chest who chuckled and held Jongin to him tighter. “Are you busy on Tuesday?” Jongin shook his head, leaving a faint kiss to his skin, tracing small shapes with his fingertips against his back. “Have a fight?” Chanyeol hummed in acknowledgment, making Jongin look up with a pout. “I’ll be there, but afterward can we do something?” Chanyeol grinned, leaning down to kiss Jongin’s nose. “Took the words from my mouth, beautiful.” 

Beautiful, Jongin smiled widely at that as he rested his hand on Chanyeol’s cheek. “Try not to get too hurt on Tuesday, please? Actually, beat them up?” Chanyeol nodded, pecking Jongin’s lips, “I’ll try, next time I’ll spend the night but tomorrow morning I have to meet my trainer at my house, so I have to go now,” Jongin nodded and he didn’t feel sad, a smile on his face as he gripped Chanyeol by the chin to press one more lingering kiss before he got off the bed and changed. He noticed how the smile never moved from his lips, and not even when Chanyeol kissed him goodbye one more time. “I’ll text you, and see you Tuesday,” Jongin nodded, waving goodbye and fell back on his bed with a grin on his lips.

 

Baekhyun always had a fixation on Jongin’s ass and today was no different as Baekhyun kept making every attempt to grope Jongin’s butt in the tight skinny jeans. “Can you behave? We’re in public, at a client meeting mind you,” Jongin reprimanded with a little smile on his lips, watching Baekhyun’s eyes bounce up from his ass to meet his eye contact. “I’m sure he won’t mind, I mean he fucks it doesn’t he?” Jongin rolled his eyes and walked into the coffee shop but not without Baekhyun stopping him from a minute to slip his hand in Jongin’s back pocket and keep it there.

Chanyeol was busy today, they had a brief morning phone call since Chanyeol insisted he missed Jongin’s voice and Jongin’s never going to be one to pass up hearing Chanyeol talk. Sehun requested the meeting, Jongin didn’t know the reason and Baekhyun knew but didn’t want to tell him. It annoyed him a little bit to have to see Sehun outside of a work setting now, considering all the other did was treat him like shit. Jongin shooed Baekhyun’s hand out his back pocket as he took a seat, leaning back against the chair and leaned his head on Baekhyun’s shoulder. 

“He’s late to his own meeting,” Jongin quipped, feeling Baekhyun’s hand run through his hair. “You know drug dealers have pressing matters, not everyone is a boxer,” Jongin’s cheeks flushed and swat at Baekhyun’s shoulder, “keep him out of this.” Baekhyun flashed him a cheeky grin, cocking his head to the side. “To think I thought you and Sehun would hit it off based off the party but I suppose a pretty face and good sex doesn’t compensate for a shitty personality. I thought you’d fall in love with me and you’d let me dedicate sonnets to your ass and give you a lifetime of everything you could ever want but I guess lanky guys with a permanent scab on their lip happens to be your type,” Baekhyun commented playfully and Jongin’s cheeks only heat up more at the words. 

“I thought I fucked you the best Jonginnie what happened to that?” Jongin looked up at Baekhyun, a smug grin on his lips, “you’re the one who said that not me,” Baekhyun put a hand over his heart, dramatically gasping, “you wound me, Kim Jongin.” Jongin giggled, putting his chin on Baekhyun’s shoulder, “you just want to be my favorite, Byun Baekhyun.” Baekhyun’s smile turned smug, shrugging carelessly as Jongin moved from his shoulder, “what can I say? I like the feeling to be mutual,” Jongin liked that it was always so easy with Baekhyun to joke around things like this, and Jongin wouldn’t admit it to Baekhyun, but he was his favorite friend to have. 

“Sorry I’m late,” Sehun’s voice interrupted the conversation, making Jongin scoot away from Baekhyun entirely and nod faintly, shrugging, turning to Baekhyun to let him take over the conversation. “It’s fine, we weren’t here very long anyhow,” Sehun smiled faintly and turned to Jongin who smiled lightly. “I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you since I met you,” Jongin’s eyes widened over at Baekhyun, “you weren’t supposed to say anything I said it was fine.” Baekhyun sheepishly smiled, rubbing the back of his neck as he gestured to Sehun. “Jongin, it’s his first time doing this whole thing and he didn’t know there’s a whole code of general conduct about it and so I mentioned something because it bothered me to see you be treated that way.” 

Jongin exhaled loudly through his nose, letting go of Baekhyun’s hand and folded them on top of the table. He looked back at Sehun who looked a little nervous to be sitting in front of Jongin. “It’s fine, Sehun,” Sehun shook his head and sighed out quietly. “No, it’s not. I treated you like shit and I don’t think you deserved that. I genuinely want to get to know you and make you feel better with being with me and that’s what I was hoping for today.” Jongin’s eyebrow quirked, looking over at Sehun as his leg twitched beneath the table. “You wanted to get to know me today?” Sehun nodded before quickly adding, “if it’s okay with you, of course.” 

Jongin went to shake his head but instead, he sighed, gesturing between them, “what’s that going to fix exactly? Your treatment towards me will change or what?” Sehun nodded and smiled very warmly over at Jongin, “it will, I promise.” Jongin eyed Sehun up and down before sighing out in defeat, it wouldn’t hurt to try to at least get to know him, considering the only one to benefit from this situation would be him. “Fine, whatever you wanna do we’ll do it,” Sehun smiled and turned to look over at Baekhyun who sighed quietly. “Okay, call me whenever you’re done, Jongin-ah,” Jongin’s eyes widened, looking between the two. 

He didn’t sign up for the plan of being alone with Sehun all day, he signed up for a client meeting and yet Jongin had no choice to watch Baekhyun walk out of the cafe. “Are you hungry?” Sehun asked before Jongin could make up an excuse as to why he couldn’t be with Sehun alone. Jongin had to admit he was hungry, stomach growling a little bit at the mention of food. “A little… you know you don’t have to actually listen to Baekhyun, I don’t care,” Jongin tried and Sehun stood, standing next to Jongin and extended his hand out. “I care, I don’t want you to dread seeing me or think I think lowly of you, I want to get to know you as a person and have you know me.” Jongin eyed his hand before slipping his own into it, he liked Chanyeol’s better, he decided. They exited the cafe though, and Sehun didn’t have a lot to say, unlike Chanyeol who always had something to say. 

Jongin likes that about Chanyeol that he always filled the void with things to say. He could easily put in his input on things that he wanted to say and Chanyeol never pressured him to speak either. “What’s your favorite food?” Sehun’s light voice filled the air around them, hands swinging next to each other now. “Fried chicken, you?” Sehun shrugged, tilting his head to the side. “I don’t know, I like bulgogi enough but I think I’m more of a beverage person than I am food. Bubble tea is my favorite when it comes to that,” Jongin smiled faintly, turning his head to look over at him. “I like bubble tea, too.” Sehun seemed to relax a little bit at Jongin opening up to him, and maybe this wouldn’t be too horrible.

Sehun was interesting and complex as Jongin got to know him, quiet but likes dogs and cheesy jokes. He preferred romantic comedies and gets easily scared at horror movies, and he likes binge watching American television shows just for the variety of it all. He’s afraid of the dark, which is why he likes to have sex with the lights on and Jongin thought that was pretty cute considering having sex with the lights on was usually meant to see who they’re fucking and how they look; Sehun just didn’t want to be cloaked in darkness. He preferred desserts over any other meal, Jongin couldn’t blame him, but he drew a line at Sehun claiming mochi cakes are better than fried chicken.

His laugh was loud and seemed to make a little wheeze noise before he got too carried away with it, and when he did he had to muffle it into his hands. Jongin found himself infinitely more comfortable with Sehun and knew more about him, and maybe this idea wasn’t too bad after all. Sehun seemed to respect him a lot more and not want to demean him into just being nothing more than a prostitute so Jongin supposes that was good. Still, no matter what, Jongin liked Chanyeol, and the thought made warmth fester in his stomach. 

 

Jongin hated Tuesday’s for a lot of reasons. For one, Tuesday is his day with Jongdae and Jongin always ends up looking disgusting and sweaty afterward with a few red marks on his wrists and ankles from being tied. Secondly, he ends up late to everything because the appointment drags on, and it gives him no time to care for himself so he ends up grumpy. So, in his typical Tuesday fashion, he showed up late to the fight and showed up when Chanyeol was crowned the winner. Jongin sighed quietly and immediately walked backstage of the new dingy warehouse with a little frown on his lips that seemed to be permanent from the moment he stepped out of the house.

He ran his fingers through his sweat-matted hair to try and smooth it out, tilting his head to the side as he spots Chanyeol with blood dripping from his nose on the cement floor. “I thought I told you not to get too hurt,” Jongin spoke quietly, noticing the smile quirk on Chanyeol’s lips before he turned his head to look at Jongin. He winced at the blood dripping down his lips and Jongin didn’t go over to him yet, going over to the hand rags and made his way over to Chanyeol. “I thought I said I’d try, never made a promise baby.” Jongin flushed with a small smile as he held the towel to Chanyeol’s nose with a gentle pinch for pressure. “I didn’t see you in the stands, I thought you forgot,” Chanyeol said quietly, Jongin shook his head looking at his hand cupping Chanyeol’s nose before meeting Chanyeol’s soft gaze. “No, um, had a client today and he always runs late and, I’m sorry,” Chanyeol cupped his cheek, Jongin noticed the cuts on his knuckles but Chanyeol’s thumb drawing over his bottom lip distracted him. 

“Don’t be sorry, I understand. I’m just glad you’re here,” Chanyeol murmured and Jongin smiled softly, moving the towel to adjust it and wiped softly at the blood against Chanyeol’s mouth. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Jongin’s heart was swarmed with butterflies and if Jongin didn’t know he liked Chanyeol before, he’d know it now. “Jonginnie what would I do without you?” Jongin smiled then and tilt his head to the side, moving the hand towel away and sighed in relief at the bleeding coming to a stop. “Let your nose bleed out onto the floor,” he quipped, relishing in the warmth that Chanyeol’s laughed swarmed around him. “But really, you make me so happy,” Chanyeol pressed a kiss to his cheek and Jongin felt a blush race down his chest. “You’re too kind,” he whispers, feeling infinitely hotter and more blushed than before, and Chanyeol wasn’t having that simple comment. 

“I’m being honest, do I make you happy?” Jongin’s heart was pounding in his ears as he swallowed thickly, looking over at him. “Really happy, Chanyeol,” Chanyeol grinned and Jongin pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, then his chin. “I’m so glad,” Chanyeol murmured, and Jongin looked up at him, wiping the blood off his knuckles before taking his hand. “Hey, wanna go to the diner?” Chanyeol nodded before his face lit up, “do you want to meet my friends? You don’t have to if you don’t want to but I think they should see the cause of my happiness,” Jongin nodded with a shy smile, scratching the back of his neck, “I’d like that.” Chanyeol pecked his lips with a wide grin on his lips, “don’t be nervous, they’ll like you.”

 

Kyungsoo and Junmyeon were definitely characters of their own but Jongin didn’t dislike them. Kyungsoo, the organizer of the cockfights had a crazy look in his eyes and layered shaved hair. Shorter than both Jongin and Chanyeol, but looked an even height with Junmyeon who had a slate silver hair color with a cigarette tucked behind his ear. Junmyeon ran an underground casino who seemed to have an affinity for fire, but he seemed a little tamer than Kyungsoo who talked excitedly to the table about a fight he went to on Saturday night and how his chicken won in the cage. 

Jongin sat tucked beneath Chanyeol’s arm as he laughed at the jokes floating around the table. On top of that, the food was great since Jongin picked the diner and he likes to think his taste in food is rather revolutionary. Jongin hummed quietly and snuck little kisses to Chanyeol’s mouth when Kyungsoo and Junmyeon weren’t paying attention, and Jongin reveled in the way Chanyeol smiled down at him with all the adoration in the world. Jongin took every affection gave him in stride and it almost felt too domestic, too cute, too boyfriend like but he wasn’t going to go against it at all. 

He felt so happy to be with Chanyeol like this and to have a glimpse of a life he’s always wanted for himself. Someone as lovely as Chanyeol too and Jongin was sure he couldn’t have felt more lucky and happy to be with him. “Baby?” Chanyeol murmured in his ear, capturing Jongin’s attention with a pleasant hum. “Can you come over to my apartment tonight? I have a surprise for you,” Jongin grinned now and nodded, leaning into Chanyeol’s side further and turned his face to press a kiss against his chest. “You two are really cute,” Junmyeon commented offhandedly and Chanyeol grinned over at his friend, “he makes us cute.” Jongin shook his head with a whine to disagree but Chanyeol just pressed his lips to his and Jongin happily let the argument drop.

 

Chanyeol’s apartment was everything Jongin expected but didn’t expect at the same time. He expected the clutter, movies sloppily organized on a shelf, a sofa with a throw blanket messily thrown on the cushion. He had little trinkets from comics or just toys, and pictures of him and Kyungsoo and Junmyeon framed on the fireplace or on the coffee tables. Although he didn’t expect the record albums hung on the wall next to signed guitars, bright oranges, and yellows decorated making it little quirky. Jongin liked it though, and he thought it suited Chanyeol so perfectly. 

“This is very you,” Jongin turned his head over his shoulder, catching Chanyeol’s grin. “Thank you, sit on the couch and close your eyes, I wanna give you the surprise,” Jongin rolled his eyes playfully but obliged anyway, taking a seat on the sofa and closed his eyes. He felt Chanyeol’s fingers hold his wrists gently and place the palms of his hands over his face. Jongin stayed still, leaning back against the soft cushion on Chanyeol’s couch. He could smell the faint traces of coconut shampoo and a smell that distinctly smelled like Chanyeol. He felt at home here, and that terrified him but made him feel good all at once. 

He heard a door shut and soft rustling around him, a faint sound of Chanyeol stumbling until he felt the couch beside him dip for the newly added weight. “Open,” Chanyeol’s soft voice mumbled making Jongin’s hands drop and eyes open to turn to Chanyeol sitting next to him with an acoustic guitar sitting in his lap. Jongin’s lips naturally fell into a grin, hands flying to cover his mouth, speaking into it making his voice muffled, “you did not,” Chanyeol nodded, moving his hands down. “I really like this song I’m going to play you, and I may not be the best singer ever but for you, I’ll take the risk,” Chanyeol murmured. Chanyeol’s fingers strummed along with the guitar that Jongin immediately recognized to be Creep. His singing voice was smooth and baritone and his eyes either moved from the strings on the guitar or to meet Jongin’s gaze.

Jongin felt warm all over as his eyes felt a little watery, a grin taking over his lips as he scoots closer to Chanyeol. This has been a dream of his for a while now, wanting someone to serenade him. It felt all too much like a cheesy romance anime that Jongin has seen, holding his phone tightly to his chest with a dreamy look as he watched, entranced. Now he has Chanyeol, a real guy in front of him who was giving him everything he willed himself to not think about as he laid alone or next to Baekhyun. This felt too real, Jongin thinks, Jongin has to be sure that he can’t just be doing this because they’re friends. The guitar stopped and Chanyeol looked at him with such a genuine nervous smile, he felt his heart stop in his chest. He looked so beautiful, and Jongin didn’t know what to say or how to react besides taking the guitar gently out of Chanyeol’s grasp and clamber in his lap. 

Chanyeol chuckled quietly, looking Jongin’s watery eyes over while Jongin cupped Chanyeol’s face. “Please tell me this is real for you,” Jongin whispered as a tear fell down against his left cheek, eyes closing when Chanyeol’s thumb brushed against it. Chanyeol hummed softly, pressing a chaste kiss to Jongin’s mouth, and he expected Chanyeol to say no, reject him, anything against his favor. “This is real for me, I like you Jongin, I want you,” Jongin’s eyes opened at that as he let out a relieved sigh, brushing his thumbs over his cheeks. “I’m so used to everything being fake or being used and yet, you’re here, and you want something real with me,” Chanyeol nodded with a warm fond smile taking over his features, “just you. I have real feelings for you, Jongin.” 

Jongin’s heart felt like it was floating as it raced inside his chest, making him press his lips to Chanyeol’s but not before whispering “I have real feelings for you too.” Chanyeol’s lips pressed to his harder but almost in a way to convey emotion, true passion in each kiss. Jongin’s arms wrapped around his neck to hold them close as Chanyeol’s hands moved to his thighs, easily lifting him up. He didn’t know where they were going as he disconnected his lips from Chanyeol’s mouth down to his neck, lips ghosting kisses until choosing to nip on the crook of his neck. His back rested against something soft, Jongin figured it was a bed as he rolled his tongue over the little red mark before nipping down harder with a suck to leave a hickey to last a while. Chanyeol was his, and finally, Jongin could claim something of his own.

Chanyeol’s throaty grunt encouraged him to keep going until he felt his hair get pulled back for Chanyeol to leave a hickey, one that was going to last, Jongin smiled through a whimper. Chanyeol took off his shirt before Jongin’s, giving Jongin time to look over his skin before sitting up to press kisses along his chest and sigh in content at Chanyeol’s fingers running through his hair. “You’re so beautiful, Chanyeol,” Jongin murmured, to which Chanyeol only chuckled and brushed his thumb underneath Jongin’s jawline. “You’re ethereal, lay down for me,” Jongin did as he was told but not without leaving one last kiss to his skin, and met Chanyeol’s gaze that looked so fond, so sweet, so warm and it was all directed towards him. He felt Chanyeol’s lips roam against his chest, stopping to pay attention to his nipples which made Jongin’s back arch to the touch. 

He could memorize this night in his brain and replay it for as long as he lived if he wanted to. Chanyeol undressing him so slow and taking his time to lather every part of Jongin’s body with a kiss. Chanyeol leaving another hickey to Jongin’s inner thigh felt more intimate than a kiss ever had before, and it was like he really was establishing what was his. Chanyeol lifting Jongin’s legs to rest them over his shoulder and pressing a kiss behind his knee with a flitted finesse made Jongin’s cheeks blush a red color. Chanyeol took his time opening him up slowly, in between kisses and soft words of praise like how good he was doing, how beautiful he is, how happy he makes Chanyeol, Jongin would’ve cried if he wasn’t feeling so good and consumed with warmth. He fucked him slow, deep, both in time with each other’s movements and sounds, hands laced together. Muffled moans throughout their kisses and Jongin whispering in Chanyeol’s ear how complete he feels, how happy he feels, how he’s Chanyeol’s, and it didn’t take much longer after Chanyeol’s thrusts to start getting sloppy for them to come.

Jongin laid curled up against Chanyeol’s chest, the lights off now with just the moon shining in through the blinds. “What do you like for breakfast?” Chanyeol murmured, to which Jongin only smiled and tilt his head back to kiss his lips soundly, humming out faintly. “Don’t worry about breakfast right now,” Chanyeol whined quietly, pecking his lips a few times before scattering the kisses against his face. “I wanna make you breakfast tomorrow morning,” Jongin smiled at his words, resting his hand against the side of his neck, “waffles if you’re so insistent.” Chanyeol dipped his head in the crook of Jongin’s neck, Jongin closed his eyes and held Chanyeol so close to him that he could feel the rise and fall of his chest against his own. 

His eyelids felt heavy as he leaned his cheek against Chanyeol’s head, smiling at the kisses against his shoulder and neck. “I am insistent, what time do you have to go back home tomorrow?” Jongin hummed quietly, brushing his fingers through Chanyeol’s hair, “11, I promised Baekhyun I’d help him recruit a new person to work for him,” he whispered, dipping his head down to kiss behind his ear. “Can I see you Friday night like always?” Chanyeol murmured, and Jongin nodded with a smile, “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t come to see me,” he could feel Chanyeol’s smile against his shoulder.

 

Friday has become Jongin’s favorite night, sitting excitedly on the bed as he watched the time go by, counting down each minute. He didn’t know if he and Chanyeol were dating, or if they were just going slow but he didn’t mind. Jongin didn’t mind since they talked every night on the phone to fall asleep. Chanyeol’s voice sounded so peaceful over the phone, but he liked it better in person. He watched the door open to reveal the tall man in a simple black tee and skinny jeans, making him smile fondly as he rushed to his feet to press a kiss to his lips, making Chanyeol chuckle before kissing him back. “Missed me?” He teased quietly, making Jongin nod with a shy smile taking over his features. “I did,” Chanyeol couldn’t help but smile back. 

Chanyeol guided them over to the bed, making Jongin sit on his lap. His larger hands rested on Jongin’s thighs, smiling at the hickey he made still present against his skin as he pushed the basketball shorts up against his thighs. “Mine,” Chanyeol mumbled as Jongin nodded, nudging his nose over Chanyeol’s, “yours.” Chanyeol looked up at him, cupping Jongin’s cheek, “live with me,” Jongin’s eyes widened at that and went to speak but Chanyeol continued, “I can get you out of here and take care of you.” Jongin shook his head slowly, looking down a bit guiltily. “I can’t, I have a contract with Baekhyun and if I want to leave I have to pay him money I don’t have,” Chanyeol’s hand dropped, and for once around Chanyeol, Jongin felt cold. “How much?” Chanyeol’s voice wasn’t fond anymore, it sounded distant and hurt to which Jongin swallowed and looked up. “10k,” he muttered and Chanyeol let out a sigh. 

He wondered how the energy shifted from so happy and warm to something so cold and distant, something that made Jongin feel small. He scoots off Chanyeol’s lap to sit next to him on the bed and Chanyeol finally let out a sound, a dry cracked laugh as he looked over to him. “Why didn’t you tell me this beforehand?” Jongin looked up, eyebrows furrowing, “before what?” Chanyeol ran a hand through his hair letting out a sigh of frustration, gesturing to Jongin, “before I started to like you? Or get involved with you? You had to have known I liked you before I said anything.” Jongin shook his head, turning to face Chanyeol as a scoff fell from his lips, “no I didn’t, and I didn’t think it mattered to you, I didn’t know what was going on until Tuesday night.” 

Chanyeol pursed his lips in a line, and Jongin felt so scared because he knew he was going to lose him and he didn’t know how to stop it besides tell him he’ll save money to get out of the contract but even then, that could take a while. “So what am I supposed to do? Be okay with people touching you and fucking you while I sit at home and wait for you to be done?” Jongin’s heart stung at that, eyes stinging with water as he averted his gaze to his lap, “I can save money or something,” he tried. He tried so hard right there to offer anything to give Chanyeol some sort of assurance, but Chanyeol scoffed at the mention. “So that is what I’m supposed to do, huh? I should’ve known better,” Jongin looked up at him then with his eyebrows furrowed. “Known better for what?” Chanyeol looked over at him, shaking his head, “I should’ve known better before I caught feelings for a prostitute, Jongin.” 

It felt hard to breathe at the moment as a tear fell down Jongin’s face. His vision became blurry as more tears fell down his cheeks and he quickly stood from the bed, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hands. Chanyeol always had been someone Jongin felt safe around because of the fact that he insisted they were equal. That Jongin was just Jongin around him, and Chanyeol was just Chanyeol, and now it’s clear that what he said then was a lie. Jongin’s a prostitute, and he always will be a prostitute for as long as he takes money to have sex with someone. Chanyeol’s sentence made it abundantly clear at that moment as Jongin’s tears kept slipping from his eyes. He noticed the way Chanyeol’s face looked guilty for even saying it, and Jongin sniffled loudly. 

“Get out,” he muttered, watching Chanyeol shake his head quickly, “no I didn’t mean it like that,” Jongin laughed dryly then, heart quaking with pain in his chest. “No? Then how did you fucking mean it then, Chanyeol? You should’ve known better before catching feelings for a prostitute, that sentence says exactly how you meant it.” He bit on the inside of his cheek to withhold the sob and Chanyeol’s silence told Jongin everything he needed to know as well. That is how he meant it, and he knew how Chanyeol saw him now. “Leave, just, just leave. I thought you were different,” he barely managed out through a whisper. Chanyeol stared at him for a few moments longer, and Jongin really wanted him out of the room so he could let out every tear and sob he had been holding back. Jongin heard his footsteps, the door opening, then shutting before he sunk down to the floor with his face buried in his hands.

He let out the sob he had been holding in as his body shook like a leaf with tears, hurt and betrayal flooding his veins. He should’ve known boys like him don’t get happy endings, he should’ve known that Chanyeol wasn’t going to be a permanent fixture and that his words were merely sweet lies. He should’ve kept his wall up, but he didn’t, and he got swept in everything so beautiful about Chanyeol. He left as fast as he came but Jongin was left with the stains of it. The stains of Chanyeol’s mouth against his own and what a smile against his lips felt like, the stain of Chanyeol’s voice whispering in his ear about how perfect he is in every single way possible, the stain of his heart feeling lighter than it had ever felt before, the feeling of safety, the feeling of being wanted by someone for more than a warm body. 

He didn’t hear the door open or the sound of Baekhyun calling his name, but he felt his thinner arms wrap around him. Jongin clung to him like he’s a lifeline, shaking against his chest as his tears dampened his shoulder. He told Baekhyun every single detail, ending on Tuesday morning when Chanyeol fed him waffles and kissed him while passing every compliment in the world past his lips, promising more days like that one to come, promising the both of them happiness. Jongin told Baekhyun about their late night phone calls and text messages, how they both confided in one another with things they wouldn’t dare tell anybody else. He could barely talk when it came to telling Baekhyun about what happened tonight, but he managed and Baekhyun pressed light kisses to Jongin’s hair as he managed to get him on the bed and curled to his chest.

Baekhyun’s fingers ran through his hair as he whispered how it’d be okay, how he’ll realize he was wrong and how Chanyeol was stupid to treat Jongin how he did. Jongin calmed down eventually after Baekhyun persuaded him to drink water and do breathing exercises. “Do you want me to take him off the client list?” Jongin looked down at his fingers resting against Baekhyun’s chest, and that was a loaded question in itself. On one hand, he wanted to see if Chanyeol would ever come back for him, but he knew Chanyeol wouldn’t. On the other hand, he didn’t want to hurt anymore, and he knew taking Chanyeol off the client list wouldn’t be the answer but it was a start. Both of the thoughts circulated in his mind and he knew Chanyeol wouldn’t come back for him, so Jongin nodded as another tear fell down his cheek. “Take him off,” Baekhyun kissed his cheek and lifted Jongin’s chin to make the other look up at him, “he’ll realize he made a mistake, don’t cry anymore. You deserve someone who will love you no matter what, and I suppose he wasn’t it.” Jongin nodded silently and rested his head against his chest even though he disagreed with him about Chanyeol not being it.

 

Heartbreak made Jongin’s world appear in shades of grey. He was right about Chanyeol not coming back for him, he didn’t text him once since that night a week ago. Sehun booked an appointment for tonight on this Friday, so Jongin found himself sitting on his bed again as he fiddled with his fingers. His thumbs delicately messing with his knuckles and tilt his head to the side. He felt void of emotions right now besides sadness, he didn’t know heartbreak would be so bad. He’s seen it on movies, heard it in songs, but living the actual physical pain of it all was too much to deal with. He thought they were overreacting in the movies and songs but living with the actual pain felt like so much to deal with that he couldn’t focus on anything anymore. 

A knock on the door jolted him from his thoughts, calling out quietly, “come in,” and Sehun’s figure appeared at the door. He stepped in the threshold and shut it behind him, smiling at Jongin who tried to smile back but it felt fake to him. Sehun must’ve noticed as he sat next to Jongin, keeping his hands to himself. “Are you okay? You look sad,” Sehun commented quietly and Jongin knew he should’ve acted, it’s all about his client but not him but he couldn’t. He couldn’t fake a bubbly personality right now, so he shook his head. “I’m sad but don’t worry about it okay?” Sehun sighed out before turning Jongin to look at him, thumb holding his chin. “I told you that we aren’t going to be like we used to be, that I wanted to treat you right. I’m not going to sit here and fuck you when you’re feeling sad, you’re not just a sex peddling object.”

Jongin would’ve disagreed but Sehun looked truthful, and Jongin didn’t want to stop his speech when all he was trying to do was make him feel better. “It has to do with someone else,” Sehun smiled faintly, brushing his thumb over his chin. “I assumed so, a client?” Jongin didn’t want to open up about this, Baekhyun knew and that’s the fullest extent he wanted to go to but he found himself nodding under Sehun’s caring gaze. “Feelings?” Sehun asked once more and Jongin felt himself crumble at the question as a tear slipped by and nodded. Sehun’s thumb gently brushed against his cheek and took both of his hands in his own. “C’mon, let’s lay down,” Sehun guided Jongin on the bed and laid on his side, having Jongin cuddled close to his chest. Sehun wasn’t Chanyeol is all Jongin could think about but this was nice. He didn’t know if Sehun actually meant these words he was saying or the actions behind them as well but they were nice, regardless.

“You like stuffed bears right?” Sehun asked quietly into his hair, making Jongin nod and tilt his head back to look at him. “I do, why?” Sehun smiled down at him before reaching in his back pocket to pull out a small one on a keychain, making Jongin smile through the watery eyes. “You got me this?” Sehun nodded with a shrug, “I don’t know, saw it in passing and thought of you, here.” Jongin took it in his hands and nestled back closer to Sehun, forehead resting on his shoulder. “Thank you,” Jongin mumbled quietly, closing his eyes at the feeling of Sehun’s fingers brush along the dip of his spine and then relaxed to the kiss to his cheek. “No problem and the person that hurt you isn’t worth it.” Jongin opened his eyes at that, tilting his head back to see Sehun smiling down at him fondly. “Oh?” He replied intelligently, making Sehun chuckle but nod anyway, “they obviously didn’t see the beauty they had in front of them.” 

Jongin shrugged, “they made me feel better than I was like I was more than just… a hooker and then that all went away.” He whispered the last part of the sentence and felt Sehun’s hand cup his cheek. “You are more than a hooker though, I’m sorry he did that to you, you deserve better than that.” Jongin was probably going to snap if he heard someone say he deserved better than Chanyeol one more time since Chanyeol was lovely and he really missed him, but the hurt in his heart suggested that Chanyeol wasn’t all perfect. Chanyeol threw back something he was insecure about right in his face and didn’t fight for him, nothing.

“He was lovely, just when he did that though,” he murmured and Sehun nodded, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “We don’t have to do anything tonight okay? Just lay with me for a while until you feel a little better,” Sehun offered and Jongin went to argue, that he was paying Jongin for sex and not a cuddle session but Sehun shook his head, “I insist, I really don’t mind.” Jongin hesitated but he eventually nodded and laid in Sehun’s arms, drawing shapes against the other’s chest. “How’s everything going for you?” Jongin asked, listening to Sehun’s breathing. “It’s been going okay, I’ve been a little busy so I wasn’t able to come in but you know. Customers are pretty needy I guess,” Jongin giggled at that, tilting his head back to look at him. “I know the feeling of that,” Sehun laughed, pushing his fingers through Jongin’s hair. “I’m sure you do, you’re really sweet you know,” Sehun mumbled and pressed a light kiss to his nose which made Jongin’s nose crinkle up. “I try,” Sehun smiled and sat up, reaching for his phone and passed it to Jongin, “put your number in, I want to talk outside of this room.” Jongin had half the mind to say no since it felt too close to what Chanyeol did but Jongin couldn’t hold onto that forever and maybe, Sehun just wanted a friend. Jongin keyed in his number and handed it back to Sehun who grinned and held Jongin again.

Jongin didn’t feel the same safety he felt with Chanyeol but right now, anything was better than the empty broken feeling that took over his chest and made it hard to breathe. Jongin didn’t mind being here with Sehun if he ignored how badly he wanted to be with Chanyeol if he ignored how much he missed Chanyeol and that smile, that stupid grin. Another stain in Jongin’s heart and mind that grew so big it seemed to overtake everything else. Chanyeol’s smile, Chanyeol’s being, Chanyeol’s voice, his sense of humor, his laugh, his touches, his witty comments, his care, his concern, his hidden talents, his sense of style, the way he walked, the way he moved his hands when he talked, how his right eye twitched if he smiled too wide or how he looked in pain if he laughed too hard. 

Jongin shook his head of those thoughts and buried his face in Sehun’s chest, smelling the expensive cologne instead of the comforting smell of laundry detergent and coconut shampoo. He had to will away every thought about Chanyeol and eventually, he found himself being comforted by Sehun’s touch if he ignored how this wasn’t Chanyeol. Sehun seemed to be nice to him now, and Jongin didn’t mind that, he supposes this is fine. This is fine for now, he tells himself, and he feels himself relax to the point of drowsiness which Sehun caught onto. “I’m going to let you get some rest now,” Sehun murmured before pressing his lips to Jongin’s in a soft kiss. Jongin returned it, pulling away to lay his head on the pillow and watched as Sehun smiled at him before stepping out and himself being swept in a peaceful slumber.

 

A week and a half later, Jongin finds himself only texting Sehun and while it was fine, his heart still yearned for Chanyeol, rubbing over where the hickeys had faded. Sehun wasn’t as funny as him, but he supposes his dry humor was fine. He wasn’t as charming but he did have his wits about him so Jongin supposes he was fine. Sehun was fine, not great, not bad, just fine. Jongin could handle fine, Jongin could handle their light conversations that made him smile sometimes but he caught himself often staring at Chanyeol’s contact card longingly. Jongin didn’t like how weak how felt when it came to Chanyeol, but at least he wasn’t sitting around moping in his bed. He moped other places too. He didn’t let moping get in the way of doing things, he could multitask, do tasks and mope at the same time so at least he was getting slightly better. He didn’t know if it was because he finally adjusted to Chanyeol not coming back or if it’s because of Sehun. He feels like it’s the first one.

Jongin opened the door himself this time when Sehun knocked, smiling at the other male who was smiling at him back. “Is there a reason you told me to open the door for you?” Jongin teased quietly, watching as Sehun nodded. It was Sehun’s only request for today’s appointment, that Jongin opens the door for him. “I wanted to do this outside our appointment, so it feels more real you know?” Jongin’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion as Sehun’s cheeks were painted in a blush, watching Sehun. “I wanted to ask you on a date,” and Jongin felt his world stop. It was too soon to be going on a date with Sehun, especially since catching feelings were a big no-no and he missed Chanyeol so much it felt like he was losing his mind without him. 

Jongin didn’t want to hurt his feelings, and he didn’t want to shove Sehun aside for someone who wasn’t going to come back for him, but he just couldn’t. Jongin could do a lot, but he already put himself out there for someone who threw him away, and he doesn’t think he can do that again. That and Chanyeol was different for Jongin, someone who wanted him genuinely and someone who wanted to love him, protect him, give him the world. Jongin felt safe and content, secure and warm, he didn’t feel that way with Sehun. Chanyeol was different, Sehun felt like a past boyfriend or three Jongin had. They weren’t special, Sehun wasn’t special, but Chanyeol was and Jongin felt so stupid for holding onto him.

He didn’t get the chance to say yes or no when a baritone voice erupted in the hallway, one that he was sure he wasn’t going to hear again, making him freeze perfectly still in place. “Jongin,” Chanyeol called out, and Jongin couldn’t look him in the face. Jongin couldn’t turn his head, he had a million questions like how he got back in or why the fuck he was here, but he couldn’t ask him. “Don’t take him in that room,” Jongin heard Chanyeol’s voice break in that sentence and finally, he looked at him. There were so many new injuries to his face like a bandaged cut on his nose, busted lip, cuts on his cheeks going towards his hairline, jawline scratched, cuts on his neck, busted knuckles that were scabbed over, and a bruise over his eye. Jongin felt his breath hitch in his chest, “don’t tell him what to do,” Sehun piped in making Jongin turn his head. “Don’t, it’s fine, it’s fine,” Chanyeol glared at the other but when Jongin turned his head back to look at him, he softened immediately.

“Please, don’t take him in that room please,” Chanyeol’s voice pleaded, Jongin saw the tears falling down his face and Jongin held his own in, clearing his throat. “Why shouldn’t I? I’m just doing my job, being a prostitute,” he recited coldly, watching Chanyeol sniffle out with a pitiful whine escaping his throat. “I didn’t mean that I hate myself so much for saying it, especially since you feel insecure about it and being equal meant so much to you,” Jongin felt his tears slip down his cheeks and sniffled quietly. “I didn’t mean to demean you like that, I didn’t mean it. I felt so fucking miserable I couldn’t just text you and be like ‘hey I’m sorry I said that asshole thing that one time’, I had to earn my apology to you.” 

Jongin shook his head, wiping at his tears and he heard the footsteps get closer to him. He didn’t know where Sehun went at that moment because when he looked up, he saw Chanyeol close to him. “I was pissed that I couldn’t get you free from something you don’t like doing and when I said what I said, it was anger at me and it came out attacking you. Don’t take him in this room with you, he doesn’t need you like I need you, and he doesn’t miss you like I do, please, Jongin.” Jongin stared at Chanyeol, and even though he wasn’t sure if Chanyeol meant his words he missed him so much and that warm safety flooded his senses again. Jongin turned his head to Sehun and whispered quietly, “I can’t take you in here, and I can’t go on that date with you.” If Sehun had anything rude to say, he kept it to himself with a clenched jaw and a short nod before walking off and out of the hallway. 

Jongin watched Chanyeol let out a shaky breath of relief, but Jongin wasn’t done with him yet. “How did you get in here?” Chanyeol rubbed his arm, swallowing thickly. “About a week ago, I finally got Baekhyun to answer me and I told him what I was doing and he thought I was genuine enough, good enough for you.” Jongin exhaled quietly, “what were you doing?” Chanyeol kept the strong eye contact, even if they both had little tears falling from their eyes. “Fighting to get money to get you out of that contract as my apology to you,” Jongin shook his head with a little laugh, swatting at Chanyeol’s chest in disbelief, “you’re fucking with me.” Chanyeol smiled faintly and reached in his pocket to pull out a hefty wad of money, sniffling as he looked up at Jongin again. 

“Jongin, I need you, I miss you, and I could take care of you. I know this is so fast and I know that you’re scared I’ll hurt you again but I’d rather get a busted lip 100 times than see you cry ever again,” Chanyeol’s words felt like a promise, and Jongin sniffled through more tears slipping down his cheeks. “You’re Jongin, and I’m Chanyeol, and I mean that sentence no matter what you do as a job. I want us to be Jongin and Chanyeol together, equals but lovers, and I want you to be happy. Selfishly, I want you happy with me. I missed you so much, please, take me back. You don’t even have to take this money and get out of the contract if you don’t want to, I’ll respect that too just please, be with me.” 

Jongin couldn’t find the words as his lips quirked into a smile. He didn’t know where this was going to go and he didn’t know if he’d end up hurt again. Jongin just felt like wherever Chanyeol was, was home. He felt safe again, warm again, loved again, and he felt the genuine promises in Chanyeol’s words whenever he spoke them. Chanyeol’s special, Jongin knows it in his soaring heart as he stared at the other who had bruised skin. Bruised skin to free Jongin from something that makes him unhappy and even would accept Jongin staying where he is now. He couldn’t find the words to express himself so instead, he cupped Chanyeol’s cheek and pressed his lips to his. 

Chanyeol gasped in shock against Jongin’s lips but that hesitation quickly fell away when he kissed Jongin back, placing a hand over Jongin’s and kept him in place. The kiss said everything that was needed to say, that Jongin will be with him, that Jongin missed him too, that they both felt the same for one another and all the passion and feeling in the world was poured between their lips, and their smiles matched one another in the kiss. Chanyeol was first to pull away as he rested his forehead against Jongin’s, the beautiful grin Jongin had come to know was on his mouth and finally, he whispered, “I’ll stay with you, I’ll leave here,” Jongin had seen a lot of things on Chanyeol but he insists the blinding happiness his eyes and smile radiated was the most beautiful.

 

Jongin sat on Chanyeol’s lap after his fight that he won, the wounds weren’t too brutal for this one but Jongin liked sitting on his boyfriend’s lap regardless. They were laughing about a stand-up comedy show they watched last night on Chanyeol’s laptop, curled up in the bed together, laughing as they smiled at one another. 

It’s been a blissful month of dating and since Jongin had been freed from being a prostitute. Sehun hadn’t talked to him since that day but Jongin keeps in touch with Baekhyun, Yixing, and Minseok, even got the three to come out and meet Chanyeol, Kyungsoo, and Junmyeon. He works as a dance teacher now for children’s ballet, always was a dream of his to teach dance whereas Chanyeol kept fighting. Chanyeol liked to fight and Jongin wasn’t going to stop him, he’d just be a cheerleader and clean up his wounds if they ever got too bad. Jongin felt happier than he had in a long time, he felt free, he felt like just Jongin, it seemed as if Chanyeol kept his word about them being happy together as equals. 

“Jongin,” Chanyeol’s deep voice snapped him out of his thoughts, making Jongin turn to him with a fond smile, “Yeollie?” Chanyeol liked when Jongin called him that so he always made sure to slip it in whenever he could. “I love you,” Jongin’s eyes widened but a grin came on his face, looking at Chanyeol who looked confident and cool. “I love you too,” Jongin mumbled quietly, watching Chanyeol dig in his pocket for a small box. He couldn’t be, it’s only been a month and sure they moved fast but this was too soon, Jongin thought as he panicked a little bit.

“Hey, relax, this isn’t an engagement ring,” Chanyeol chuckled, kissing Jongin’s cheek. He must’ve looked shocked and scared but Jongin’s lips curled into a sheepish smile as he scratched the back of his neck. “Sorry,” Chanyeol shook his head, smiling, “it’s too soon, don’t worry. It’s a promise ring, a promise I’ll do my best to keep you happy and make our lives as wonderful as possible for as long as you stay with me,” Chanyeol murmured, opening the box to a simple silver band with a single crystal embedded on the front. Jongin’s eyes watered as he smiled and took the ring between his fingers, slipping it on his ring finger and pressed a kiss to Chanyeol’s lips as he tried to convey that he’d keep that same promise. Chanyeol smiled against Jongin’s lips and he needed nothing more than this, he knew that for sure.

**Author's Note:**

> sry for making sehun a little fucking bitch  
> n sry chanyeol had a bitch moment


End file.
